I gave a talk yesterday in church. I started working on it on the 3rd (spent at least 4 hours) and still didn't have a solid start the Saturday before my talk. I just couldn't seem to connect my ideas together. My mom helped me throughout the week, which I so appreciate since she had her own talk to work on, and it finally came together late Saturday. Then I began timing myself and practicing. I stumbled over so many words and it was 22 minutes long! I didn't slept very well that night and just seemed to worry about speaking in front of everyone. I had never stumbled so much while practicing my talk before and the nerves were getting the better of me.
Sunday came and I was blessed by my Heavenly Father to only stumble over a few words, which is pretty amazing considering at times I had a hard time seeing through the tears. This talk touched me more than any other I have given. Every time I have read it a different part made me emotional. The older lady, who also gave a wonderful talk, told me her talk was 15 minutes. So I calculated everything and with the choir singing I didn't read my last story or paragraphs pertaining to it, and we ended at exactly 12:00. A big relief! I felt confident while reading it and though tried to keep my emotions under control, think it went pretty well. The only thing I would change would be to have had my family there, especially my mom. I don't think either sides of my family have every heard me talk and sometimes it is just nice to have that support.
I
thought I would begin with a short introduction since we have only been in this
ward for about 10 months. My name is Camey Sant and I am originally from Lake
Stevens, Washington. I moved to Logan in the summer of 2003 to finish my
education at USU. My husband, Clif and I were married in January 2005 and later
that year moved to Tooele when I was offered a job teaching at Overlake
Elementary. I taught there for 4 years before becoming a stay at home mom. We
have 5 children: Spencer who is 6, Addelyn who is 4, Allyson and Haleigh who
are 2, and TJ who is 2 months.
In the April 2009 General Conference President Monson stated,
“Be of Good Cheer. The Future is as bright as your faith. None
of us makes it through this life without problems and challenges—and sometimes
tragedies and misfortunes. After all, in large part we are here to learn and
grow from such events in our lives. We know that there are times when we will
suffer, when we will grieve, and when we will be saddened,” but we still must
continue on. We must learn to rely on
our Heavenly Father and strengthen our faith in him. We need to hold to the
iron rod with all our might, mind, and strength
In May of 2010 I was 4 months
pregnant with twins when my husband came home from work early. I was excited to
have him home as his car had broken down and I had been without one all week. I thought they let him
off early for the Memorial Day weekend, but instead our world was about to be
flipped upside down as he had been laid off due to the lack of work in his
industry.
Of course there are a lot of emotions that go into hearing
that news: shock, anger, sadness, stress, but especially worry. I wanted to
make sure Clif was doing alright and let him know that it wasn't his fault. He
works so hard for our family, and never takes much deserved time off. I tried
not to think about all the things that weren’t going to happen. I tried not to
think about the house we may never live in, not only because it is our 2nd home
we have tried to build, but because we pictured raising our family there. I had
already paid a deposit for Spencer's preschool, but that was just another thing
in a long line that might not happen. Of course while none of those things were
really big deals, they still affected me at the time. I especially tried not to
think about how we were going to live.
His unemployment was either enough to pay rent or enough to
eat, not both. His unemployment left no money for my medical bills or gas for
me to go to my doctor visits, which were essential for my babies, as Haleigh
wasn’t getting the same nutrients as Allyson and had to be monitored
weekly. I tried to get rid of cell phones,
tv, anything, but no one was willing to work with us or break any of our
contracts. Of course our savings was pretty much nothing from medical bills,
and our house deposit.
In my journal I wrote, “so what do we do? The only thing we
can, we have faith. I don't believe this particular trial happened because we were
doing something wrong, but I do believe we can turn to the Lord and learn to
rely on him even more than we ever have before. Elder Wilford W. Andersen said,
“When we strive to keep the commandments of God, promising our best efforts to
follow the Savior, we begin to grow in confidence that through the Atonement
everything will be alright." He ended with this, "He will never
forget or abandon us, for He has engraven us upon His hands."
So while I may seem sad, or confused, or lost; I
also feel peace, hope, and have faith that there is the light at the end of the
tunnel. Clif and I both received blessings and it was comforting to know that
He is mindful of us and that as we continue to rely on him, things will be even
better than they were before. I believe it is true; it is just hard for me to
see the bigger picture right now.”
As we went through the next year and a half without work it
wasn’t always easy to have Faith. Despite the blessings we were receiving I let
my fear overcome my Faith. I became discouraged I worried, and I tried to do
everything on my own and often forgot to lean on my Heavenly Father for
support.
Looking back I know that the reason my husband was out of
work was for our two beautiful girls. I went into labor at 28 weeks and was put
on bed rest. Had he been working there is no way I would have been able to stay
off my feet as much as I did. There was a huge possibility I would have had
them too early and instead of bringing them home from the hospital, like I was
able to, they could have been in there for months. My biggest fear was that I
would have to split my time between my two older kids and my babies in the NICU.
Heavenly Father knew of my fears and he blessed me in ways I did not even begin
to understand. If only I had had the Faith during the trial to understand that
He knows what is best for each of us.
“It
isn’t just enough to talk of faith, but it requires work to develop our faith.
“Faith in the Savior requires more than mere belief, but true faith requires
work. Faith grows by keeping the commandments.”
In the October 2012 Conference, Elder Nash, of the Seventy,
who also happens to my first Bishop when my family and I moved to Washington,
related a story of hiking to the top of, a tall peak in the mountains of
Peru. He says, "It is a very steep climb with breathtaking views and
precipitous drop-offs. Sadly, some hikers have lost their lives by falling off
that narrow, steep trail. To avoid such tragedies, strong cables have since
been secured to the solid rock along the mountainside. We held to those cables
as we climbed, and they enabled us to safely reach the summit, where the view was
majestic!
"Like the path on the mountain, our mortal journey is a
steep and difficult climb, one that requires our Heavenly Father’s help to
successfully complete. Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ is like the cables
on the mountain: if strong and securely attached to “the rock of our
Redeemer,” faith will help us to safely climb the gospel path, overcome
every challenge, and return to the majestic presence of our Heavenly Father.
All things are fulfilled by faith.
He goes on to say, "Faith is manifested by a hope of
good things to come, miracles that confirm our faith, and divine protection in
spiritual and temporal matters."
These three principles can be a positive influence to guide us toward a
positive view of our future."
First, Hope of good things to come: The prophet Mormon, himself no
stranger to difficult circumstances, understood and clearly taught:
“And
again, my beloved brethren, I would speak unto you concerning hope. …
“…
Behold I say unto you that ye shall have hope through the atonement of Christ … , and this because of your faith in
him according to the promise.
“Wherefore,
if a man have faith he must needs have hope; for without faith there cannot be
any hope.”
Hope
comes from faith in Jesus Christ. He has already overcome the world and has
promised that He will wipe away our tears if we will only turn to Him and
believe and follow.
President Uchtdorf stated, "The things we
hope in sustain us during our daily walk. They uphold us
through trials, temptations, and sorrow. Everyone has experienced
discouragement and difficulty. Indeed, there are times when the darkness may
seem unbearable. It is in these times that the divine principles of the
restored gospel we hope in can uphold us and carry us until,
once again, we walk in the light."
When we are going through these trials,
especially one after another, it can be hard to see the light at the end of the
tunnel. As we go through these trials, are faith often decreases, as we wonder
why we must go through this and where our Heavenly Father has gone. We hope for
our situation to get better, hope for our prayers to be answered, hope for a
brighter tomorrow, but can easily get discouraged when things aren't going the
way we think they should.
As a little girl,
from a family of 4, I always wanted a bigger family. In fact, my 3rd grade
autobiography states that I will have twin girls and twin boys. So you can
imagine my disappointment when I couldn't become pregnant after my second
child. Six months into it I had the thought that I was going to have twins and
that was why I wasn't getting pregnant. I quickly disguarded those thoughts,
believing that I was just trying to make myself feel better. I then came to the
conclusion that this must be a lesson of patience, as I have never been patient
when I decide I want to do something. I thought I felt I had learned my lesson,
but obviously not. Afterwards, it just kept getting harder and harder. It was
hard when Addy turned 16 months, the same age Spencer was when I had her. It
was hard when everyone around me was pregnant. It was hard when everyone had
their babies and I was still not pregnant. In my journal I wrote, “I have to
keep having the faith and reminding myself, even though it is SO hard, that
it will happen when it is time. I guess I worry what if it doesn't? Will I
be unhappy? Of course not. I am blessed to have my two kids. I just have
always, always wanted a big family. I have wanted to be a mom since I can
remember. Now I will take a deep breath, hope for great things in
the New Year, and be grateful that I get to stay home with the 2 children I
have, and cherish all the time I have with them."
Some
who at this very moment feel desperate or discouraged may wonder how they can
possibly regain hope. If you are one of those, remember that hope comes as a
result of faith. If we would build our hope, we must build our faith.(Wilford
W. Andersen)
Jeffery R. Holland
has said, don’t you quit. You keep walking. You keep trying. There is hope and
happiness ahead. Some blessings come soon, some come late, and some don't come
until heaven. But for those who embrace the Gospel of Jesus Christ, they come.
It will be alright in the end. Trust God and believe in good things to
come."
Second, miracles that
confirm our faith.
Faith precedes a miracle. Miracles do
not precede faith. "For if there be no faith among the children of
men God can do no miracle among them." (Ether 12:12)
I am sure we have all experienced
some type of miracle. There are small miracles in our lives every day, we may
just not recognize them as such. An answer to a prayer, arriving home safely, a
smile given. My mom has experienced many
miracles. She has had terminal cancer for 10 years and by all accounts should
not be here today. That in itself is the biggest miracle of all. Before
the cancer diagnosis, she had been sick for three years with a horrible cough.
She coughed all day and all night until it completely wore her out.
My mom and dad spent a lot of time going to different doctors, trying to
find out what was wrong, but there weren’t any answers. One doctor told my mom
that she would either have to get sicker or modern medicine would have to catch
up with her. If only they knew that it was just a simple test that could have
found her illness.
The journey to get a diagnosis wasn't
instantaneous. The wheels moved slow until she found out that she had three
kinds of cancer. She would tell you, that even getting the diagnosis was
a miracle.
That is when the other miracles
started. First she was promised that the windows of Heaven would be opened to
direct her toward help. It took some searching and pondering on the part of my
parents, but each time a priesthood blessing was given, it would tell them
where to go and what to do, including the warning that she only had a couple
weeks left to live, which later was confirmed by the Oncologist that was
carefully selected. Early on she received a blessing that the cancers
wrapped around her throat would stop her constant coughing and just like that the
cough stopped. She believes the cough was there trying to get a doctor to
take note and it actually was what finally got the right test and results.
My mom was very, very sick by the time they started the chemo treatments.
She even had to be hospitalized. The chemo was very hard and it did not
look like she would survive the treatments. Even her doctors didn't think
she would make it. This was just the start of many miracles to come. One
by one they came and little by little she regained a measure of health.
Some are so special that they can never be shared. She had to
overcome many obstacles, and it was never believed she should ever leave her
house, let alone travel to visit me while at school in Utah. She went
from lying in a bed 24/7 to teaching a Gospel Doctrine class. When the
call was extended she thought both the Bishopric and the Lord were crazy. She
accepted the call without knowing how she would be able to stand in front of
the class for an hour. Everyone tried to figure out those details, but on
the first day of class, she stood on her own for an entire hour and taught from
scriptures that months before she could not read. Even her ability to
read again, came line upon line, miracle upon miracle. My mom is alive today
because of faith and Heavenly Father’s plan for her. Faith prepares us for
miracles that may be part of the Lord's plan for us. Some may be so small
that we don't take notice and some may be like the ones that are not shared because
they are so sacred. My mom could tell you about very good and faithful
friends who have passed on to their Heavenly home. One even gave her last
act of service to my twins. Did that dear sister not have faith? Of
course, she did, and probably received different kinds of miracles then my mom.
One of the best miracles she received was leaving this life in peace.
My mom never has stopped having cancer treatments, she receives them
every four weeks and daily through medications. Her doctor says that she is
lucky, but we know that luck has nothing to do with it. The message here
is that if we are to receive miracles in our life, we must first have faith. Faith
prepares us for miracles. Faith precedes a miracle.
The third and final point is that Faith
provides divine protection in spiritual matters and temporal matters. How
does faith provide this protection? "We are protected when we trust
in God and in His willingness to provide help, no matter how challenging the
circumstance." It could be the death of a love one, an illness or a child
who has strayed away from righteous patterns. We will receive strength and
protection through these trials as we strive to obey the commandments.
Russell M. Nelson said, “Teach of
faith to know that obedience to the commandments of God will provide physical
and spiritual protection. And remember, God’s holy angels are ever on call to
help us. The Lord so declared: “I will go before your face. I will be on your
right hand and your left, and my Spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine
angels round about you, to bear you up.”
In March 1946, Ezra Taft Benson, then a member of the Quorum
of the Twelve, was assigned a postwar tour of Europe. Elder Benson later
recounted from the experience of a Church member who found herself in an
area no longer controlled by the government under which she had resided.
She and her husband had lived in East Prussia. Then had come the
second great world war. Her beloved young husband was killed during the
final days of the frightful battles in their homeland, leaving her alone
to care for their four children.
The occupying forces determined that the Germans in East
Prussia must go to Western Germany to seek a new home. The woman was
German, and so it was necessary for her to go. The journey was over a thousand
miles, and she had no way to accomplish it but on foot. She was allowed to
take only such bare necessities as she could load into her small
wooden-wheeled wagon. Besides her children and these meager possessions, she
took with her
a strong faith in God.
She and the children began the journey in late summer. Having neither
food nor money among her few possessions, she was forced to gather a
daily subsistence from the fields and forests along the way. She was
constantly faced with dangers from panic-stricken refugees and plundering
troops.
As the days turned into weeks and the weeks to months, the
temperatures dropped below freezing. Each day, she stumbled over the
frozen ground, her smallest child-a baby-in her arms. Her three other
children struggled along behind her, with the oldest-seven years
old-pulling the tiny wooden wagon.
Soon the snows came, and the days
and nights became a nightmare. In the evenings she and the children would
try to find some kind of shelter-a barn or a shed.
And then one morning, as she awakened, she felt a chill in her heart. The
tiny form of her three-year-old daughter was cold and still, and she
realized that death had claimed the child. Though
overwhelmed with grief, she knew that she must take the other children
and travel on. First, however, she used the only implement she
had—a tablespoon—to dig a grave in the frozen ground for her tiny, precious
child. Death, however, was to be her companion again and again on
the journey. Her seven-year-old son died, either from starvation or
from freezing or both. Again her only shovel was the tablespoon, and
again she dug hour after hour to lay his mortal remains gently into the earth.
Next, her five-year-old son died, and again she used her tablespoon as a shovel.
She had only her tiny baby daughter left, and the poor thing was failing.
Finally, as she was
reaching the end of her journey, the
baby died in her arms. The spoon was gone now, so hour after hour she
dug a grave in the frozen earth with her bare fingers. Her grief
became unbearable. How could she possibly be kneeling in the snow at the
graveside of her last child? She had lost her husband and all her
children. She had given up her earthly goods, her home, and even her homeland. In
this moment of overwhelming sorrow and complete bewilderment, she felt her
heart would literally break. And then, something within her said,
"Get down on your knees and pray." She ignored the prompting until
she could resist it no longer. She knelt and prayed more fervently than
she had in her entire life:
"Dear Heavenly Father, I do not know how I can go on. I have nothing
left-except my faith in Thee. I feel, Father, amidst the desolation of my soul,
an overwhelming gratitude for the atoning sacrifice of Thy Son, Jesus Christ.
Though I do not at this moment wish to live, I will do so, that we may be
reunited as a family and return-together-to Thee."
After finally reaching her destination in Germany she bore a glorious
testimony, stating that of all the ailing people in her saddened land, she was
one of the happiest because she knew that God lived, that Jesus is the Christ,
and that He died and was resurrected so that we might live again. She testified
that she knew if she continued faithful and true to the end, she would be
reunited with those she had lost and would be saved in the celestial kingdom of
God.
This sister carried faith as her protection on the journey. Along
the trek, she experienced dangers, cold, and even death. She arrived at
her destination tattered and in the advanced stages of starvation,
but still declared to be the happiest person "in the
land", because of the protecting power of faith.
We are also protected through
"promptings of the Holy Ghost". Most, if not all of us have
probably experienced the protective powers of the Holy Ghost prompting us what
to do and sometimes how to do it. We are protected by patience and
understanding of God's plan. We understand that part of God's plan to
protect us is to let us struggle, which results in growth in both spiritual and
temporal matters. We grow and receive divine protection as we exercise our
faith and act upon the principles of the gospel. Principles such as the word of
wisdom, morality, service, and provident living (which includes food storage,
living within our means, and gaining skills to provide for our own livelihood).
All of these things could also be likened to the cables that Pres. Nash used.
These cables are provided by the Lord to help us make the trek up the mountain
and arrive safely back to Him.
Thus, the future is as bright as our faith. And do we not
see that in our young children as they pray, and show obedience and pure love
of the Savior and the gospel. Do we not see that in our youth as they
attend seminary and prepare for missions. Do we not see that in our young
adults as they prepare for marriage and college and the raising of young
children? And do we not need that as part of our life as we climb the
mountain. Faith is the cables that we hold onto in this mortal journey
just as Elder Nash's family held to cables to climb the mountain in Peru, where
they reached the summit safely.
“Remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is
Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil
shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when
all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power
over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the
rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon
if men build they cannot fall.”
President Thomas S. Monson says,“I
testify to you that our promised blessings are beyond measure. Though the storm
clouds may gather, though the rains may pour down upon us, our knowledge of the
gospel and our love of our Heavenly Father and of our Savior will comfort and
sustain us and bring joy to our hearts as we walk uprightly and keep the
commandments. Fear not. Be of good cheer. The future is as bright as your
faith.”
